Click it or ticket– posters placed every 5 feet at school (via me-llamo-matt)
Cherries are like hairy butts
WHAT IS THIS. I'm at church talking with my friends when this 13-yr-old-ish girl comes up. Imagine she's wearing the Thieu Nhi uniform shirt with cherry-decorated pajama pants.
This is her rant: Cherries are like butts. You know, the ones that look like 'hearts'? They're actually butts. They have a stem, the ONE HAIR, in their butthole, the hole where the stem's attached. And when you pluck this hairy piece of... butt hair, you can eat the cherry! But wait! Amist all that red juicy stuff, there's a chunk of hard poop, the seed.
I don't even know.
She continues: A strawberry is like a bigger butt but with many seeds. A strawberry is like a butt of pimples...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW. BLESS THIS CHILD.
Everything we said we would do, we actually did it. And that is why my friend, why you were a keeper.
If you are content, You will always have enough.– Lao Tzu (via illuminatedbeing)
My birthday is on the day of the orchestra...
Which means I can stay out all-night lollygagging and mother won’t care. Woot! My birthday never falls on a special occasion or anything special before, besides from the premiere of Shrek the Third in the 6th grade, and an orchestra concert rehearsal in the 8th. LOL. I’m pretty excited.
I have this sudden urge to dress up as a mime now that I got new black suspenders.
thatfunnyblog: “Hello Lifealert” “Hello Stella, are you okay?” “… is your refrigerator running?” “Stella, we’re all getting a little tired of your bullshit”
This is probably the worst I’ve seen.